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Hey! It's been a while, but Crazy Wayne
squoze one last article about Al's butt out of me. Did you miss me? No??? Yup, I get that a lot.
I took a brief hiatus from this article for several reasons, and
while I was away, Al's gimmick was lingering in severe 'angle limbo'.
For shame!
This edition of the Mad Phat Snowflake's Opinion will be a review
of Al's match against Goldust at the WWF House Show that I attended on February 7, 1999, a
mere 2 days before the Snowflake's birthday.
We had really decent seats (first tier, second section, to the
left of the ramp). We took pictures, but since we didn't have a super camera with a
nifty zoom feature, the pictures came out all gooey. I put them in anyways.
Al put on a fantastic performance, and Bostin Crab would like to
thank Al for that great present. =Þ
Al's match was the second of the evening (which, coincidentally,
was a primo card). He wrestled Goldust, and entered the ring first. Of
course, as soon as I heard his entrance music ("What does everybody want?") I
totally marked out, started screaming, and jumped to my feet! I'm sure everyone in
the vicinity would have been totally freaked out by me if they, themselves weren't
hopeless marks. Of course, the coolest people sitting near us were these 12-14 year
old kids who had brought a bunch of signs, in hopes that this would be a broadcast
event. Too bad... they were cool kids, and their signs were very nicely written and
easy to read (not to mention the fact that FNS was getting a buzz off of the marker smell
emanating from them).
Al came out and immediately walked around ringside, to his right,
and jumped into the audience. (No fair!!! Come up here Al!!!) He
interacted with someone in the crowd, but from our seats, we couldn't make out what was
going on.
Al got into the ring, did his usual helicopter bit, and sat down
in one of the corners. At this point, we heard Goldust's entrance theme, and I
marked out again. Actually, I probably hadn't stopped screaming since Al first came
out... Sheesh, can't take me nowhere.
I don't remember everything that happened in the exact order, but
I remember it took a while for the match to start. Right after Goldust came into the
ring, he slumped down in the opposite corner from Al. It was actually quiet in the
arena, and Frank N. Steiner yelled out to Goldust, "Your mascara is running!!"
... (!) heh... Amazingly, Goldust heard FNS, turned his head in our direction and
said something, but since he didn't have a mic, we couldn't make out what he said.
That SUCKS! hee...
Al and Goldust were horseing around, literally! Early in
the match, Al was dominating, and he jumped on Goldust's back for a horsey-ride.
At one point, Goldust got the mic, and said something to the
effect of "Please don't hit me with that mannequin head, it hurts!" heh...
you silly goose.
Another highlight in the match came when Al swung Head at Goldust
who ducked and grabbed Head away from Al. Then Goldust swung Head at Al who ducked
and grabbed Head away from Goldust. This went 'round a few times, until, of
course, Goldust got Head.
Al got the pin, and the 3-count, but Goldust got up, and knocked
Al around some more, and gave him the shattered dreams. Yikes!
NOOOooooo!!! Not the Snow balls! |
| Goldust exited, the ref exited, and Al
slumped over in the corner like a heap. I sat there thinking, 'this is where they
usually go to a commercial when you watch on tv, I wonder what Al's gonna do.' Sure
enough, Al crawled over to the mic, which was in the ring, holding himself the
whole time. (OH!) Hey Al, can I get that for ya? (OH!!! Who said
that?!?!) He attempted to speak several times, cracking his voice, really milking
it. He also jumped up and down a bit, while holding himself,
the audience roared with laughter. He finally spoke (to Head), about how he just got
kicked "in the jimmies", and how is he going to explain this to his wife, how
he's got ovaries now...
He offered to give Head an idea what it was like to take all the
abuse, so he started beating up Head. The audience started to moan in
disapproval. First, he slapped Head, knocking it to the ground. He also
piledrived Head and gave Head an elbow drop. The kicker was when he placed Head in
the center of the ring, and went for the ropes. The audience went wild. Bostin
Crab went balistic!
Al climbed to the top rope, and moonsaulted Head.
I'm still amazed at how exciting that event was. I hadn't
been to a WWF house show in at least 5 years, and man, was it different! I remember
the last one I attended, the main event was Yokozuna v. Bret Hart in a steel cage. Blech.
As I stated in the beginning of this article, Al's gimmick seems
to have been lingering in angle limbo recently. I was pleasantly surprised to see
that Al really gets the chance to work the crowd during the house shows, and that he
generated an amazing amount of heat considering his was the 2nd match of the evening.
It may seem strange, but this match really made my day, my
weekend, my birthday. I really appreciate that Al puts his all into his work.
He didn't have to job that night, but it didn't matter, even if he jobbed that match, it
would have been just as great. It was the performance that mattered.
This is an extreme-ly satisfied Snowflake sending you
all...
Hugs & Kisses,
Bostin Crab
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